We know safe sex is not the sexiest topic, but its REALLY important. So Listen up. Having sex is awesome but nothing is worst than being worried, or worst, infected with something. When that happens, you and can't even go out there and get your sexy on.
Safer sex is a term used to describe a way of engaging in sexual activity that is informed, consensual, and has protection. It decreases the risk of getting sexually transmitted infections (STIs) and potentially diseases (STDs) and unwanted pregnancy. It helps you – and your partner(s) – stay healthy and can even make sex better.
Yes, of course. Dry humping while being fully clothed will offer the highest degree of protection, and can actually be kind of fun.
Going up a notch are low to medium risk activities, which include kissing, mutual touching of genitals, using sex toys, dry humping without clothes, and oral sex. Nonetheless, any sexual activity that involves skin-on-skin contact and the exchange of bodily fluids carries the risk of sexual disease transmission, so low-medium risk still brings an extent of risk.
And when it comes to high-risk sexual activity, there's none other than unprotected penetrative sex – both vaginal and anal. This carries the highest risk of getting an STD and/or unplanned pregnancy.
To understand how safer sex can help protect you from STIs, an understanding of what STIs are, exactly, is necessary. So – an STI is a virus, bacteria, parasite, or fungus that can make you feel not so hot (or can sometimes be asymptomatic) that you get through sexual activity.
These pesky, microscopic STIs can enter through your body through your vagina, the urethra of your penis, anus, mouth – hitching a ride on semen, microscopic blood particles, or vaginal fluid. Also, not to scare you, but some STIs are transmitted through skin-to-skin contact, which means you don’t have to have sex to get them; any contact with infected skin can do it.
Here’s a brief guide to 4 common STIs, so you know what you can face if you choose to have unprotected sex:
Sometimes called 'the clap' or 'the drip,' gonorrhea is spread through vaginal, anal, and oral sex. It can infect your penis, vagina, cervix, anus, urethra, throat, and eyes. If gonorrhea is not treated early enough, it can lead to more severe health problems, such as infertility. Thankfully, it clears up quickly with antibiotics. Symptoms can include discharge, painful urination, and many more. Here is a source that fully explains everything you need to know : Gonorrhea full explanation.
Chlamydia is transmitted similarly to Gonorrhea but is more common in the general population. Though some women maybe be asymptomatic carriers, men will you usually (but not always( develop painful urination, along with a host of other symptoms. Chlamydia can be also treated with a course of antibiotics. Chlamydia full explanation.
Transmitted through semen, vaginal fluids, anal mucus, blood, and breast milk, HIV is a virus that breaks down cells in your immune system, leaving you more susceptible to getting sick. Without appropriate treatment, HIV can develop into AIDS, where life expectancy is about three years. With treatment, though, people with HIV can still live long, healthy lives, highlighting the criticality of getting tested. Though erroneously thought once as a disease that affect only the gay population, HIV is found in all populations, world-wide. Certain activities, such as anal sex do have higher risk of transmissions because of extra capillaries in that region. However, AIDS can be transmitted by vaginal and oral sex as well. Read the full details about HIV here: HIV / AIDS full explanation.
Herpes causes outbreaks of itchy, painful blisters, or sores that come and go. It spreads through skin-to-skin contact with infected areas. Many infected people don't notice the lesions or mistake them for something else, so they might not know they have herpes. There's no cure for herpes, but medication can significantly reduce symptoms and chances of transmission. Also, while uncomfortable and painful, it's not life-threatening. Herpes full explanation.
Now, since safer sex encourages the usage of a physical barrier – such as condoms, internal condoms, and dental dams, it can protect you from bodily fluids and, to a certain extent, skin-to-skin contact, which can help prevent the spreading of STIs.
Don't rely on your sexual partner for any protection, including condoms, female condoms, dental dams, and Plan B; you'll find that nothing kills a spur-of-the-moment sexy action like trying to find an open drugstore at 2 am.
When using latex condoms, use only water- or silicone-based lubricant; oil-based ones will weaken the material of the condoms and make them more likely to break. And there goes your physical barrier for bodily fluids. You should also keep an eye out for your condoms’ expiry dates; don’t use expired ones!
In today's mobile world, meeting people you want to get down with through parties, clubs, bars, or apps is relatively common. And while alcohol may make a night out with your dates seem more enjoyable, getting more than a little buzzed can significantly increase your sexual risk-taking behaviors. So, if you decide to drink, stick to an amount you can safely handle! Make a plan with yourself that you will use protection, no matter what.
You may be surprised, but everyone has different ideas about what 'safer sex' means, so you need to make sure you’re on the same page as your partner(s) before sticking your face anywhere near their nether regions. Discuss the contraception you have. Are you on birth control pills? Did you bring condoms? Does either of you need to wear tongue condoms when rimming?
It can feel much more comfortable to skip the conversation and go straight to banging. Don't. The ensuing panic attacks that you might have all of the STDs (yes, all) because you didn't set boundaries is going to kill you. With that said, you must find a sexual partner who's as aware (and respectful) of the need to practice safer sex. Dump their ass any time they make you feel like a prude for wanting to roll a rubber on.
Safer sex doesn’t necessarily need to be a killjoy; contrary to popular belief, you can make safer sex, well, sexy! Passionately kiss and touch each other while you get the dam or condom out. Keep each other highly aroused by having each other put on the condom or dam. Also – if you’re using an internal condom, get your partner to put it in your vagina or anus for you. That way, the protection method you use becomes part of the sexy action, rather than a show-stopper.
As mentioned earlier, there are a couple of no- and low-risk sexual activities you can indulge in with your sexual partner. You don't have to rush into penetrative sex right from the get-go; take your time exploring your partner's body – this can ultimately help build trust and communication. Besides, it can feel terrific too!
If you’re hooking up with many people, particularly if those people are also swapping bodily fluids with other people, it's a good idea to get routinely tested for STIs (every three or six months). It's also important to get tested whenever you suspect you may have been exposed; this could include having unprotected sex in the heat of the moment, or if a condom breaks or slips.
Here are some online resources for getting tested (we're not affiliated with any of them):
CDC Get Tested locations
STDCheck - local lab testing
Nurx - home testing kits
Planned Parenthood STD testing
In the unfortunate case you find out that you have an STI, abstain from having sex until your doctor has cleared it. In the case of an incurable STI (such as HIV, or Herpes) - you should always let your sexual partners know before rolling in the sheets with them. Doing so enables them to work with you to make a safer sex plan and help prevent the spread of your STI. And ultimately, that’s what safer sex is all about – preventing unwanted, adverse outcomes through making clear-headed decisions on sexual activities.
p.s. We're not licensed doctor by any means, so this guide / advice is not meant to replace consultation with a medical professional. Seek medical help if you develop any symptoms!
