Does Size Really Matter?

Beyond pop culture glorification (hello, Nicki Minaj's 'Anaconda') and porn norms, several studies also indicate that the average straight woman may prefer a larger than average penis. But is this really an issue of anatomy, or just a fetish?

After the first two-to-900 times you log in to pornhub, you may start to believe that the average penis size is (conservatively) about 9 inches. But that couldn’t be further from the truth. Well—technically speaking, it’s about four inches from the truth. According to a 2015 study of more than 15,000 men, the average erect penis clocks in at 5.2 inches. And unfortunately for those looking to increase the size of their members, science says that penises cannot be enlarged through exercises or medication. The only proven methods include surgery and injections—a completely valid, terrifying choice that some people make.

Does bigger always mean better?

Here’s the thing. Ask any (honest person) with an XXL penis, and you'll likely come to the realization that bigger doesn't always mean better. Is it sometimes awesome? Obviously. But not everyone (or every orifice) can handle a magnum. Common injuries include vaginal injury, anal tears, discomfort, a dislodged IUD... Yikes.

Learning to take a pounding like that can require some training. Here’s some tips.

• Try bigger sex toys – If your partner is particularly well-endowed, you can buy yourself some plus-sized sex toys, so you become accustomed to having a larger penis with a bigger girth and longer length within you. You can choose to use them during foreplay or solo. Whatever helps!
• Start with lots of foreplay – The person being penetrated (anally or vaginally) will be much better able to deal with a larger penis if well stimulated. So, engage in lots of sensual kissing, touching, and oral sex moves.
• Keep a lubricant close by – There’s no doubt about it: the number one thing you can do when someone supersized is involved grab the lube. Friction is your enemy.
• Stick to positions that keep the penetrated in charge – The positions that work the best are the ones that allow the one being penetrated to control how much or how little of his penis they’re ready to accommodate. A few examples include the cowgirl/ cowboy, standing doggy style, and side-by-side.
• Stop before it goes too far – The one doing the penetration can practice self-control and only go as far in as is comfortable for his partner. Unfortunately, though, this is a level of discipline that's difficult to achieve. So, another option is to accessorize. there are sex toys available that can limit the depth of penetration during sex.
• It applies to oral sex too—you’ve got to train that gag reflex away.

Here’s one rumor that’s actually true: girth really is more important than length. If you're like most people who enjoy the feeling of 'fullness,' you'd most definitely choose the latter. That being said, vaginas—and buttholes—usually come in a one-size-fits-all. We love a size queen, but at the end of the day, you really can work with anything, provided you’re willing to experiment.

Can sex ever be good with a micropenis?

Okay, so bigger doesn’t always mean better. What about micropenises, then? And just to make sure everyone is on the same page, a micropenis is one that's under 2.75 inches when erect. Research indicates that this condition affects only 0.6% of the world's male population. While the condition can – understandably – have devastating consequences on a man's self-esteem and sexual confidence, having a micropenis by no means spells a lifetime of unfulfilling sex.

And that’s because good sex is more than penetration. Between hands, grinding, oral, and toys, a good time can be had by all involved – regardless of the involvement of penetration.

So, how can you have better sex with a micropenis? Here are some tips:

• Have an orgasm before the penetrative sex even begins – An easy way to relieve the penis-having individual’s pressure of having to perform is to help their partner orgasm before penetration ever takes place. When you prioritize the pleasure from manual stimulation, oral, or toy play, penetration immediately becomes the icing on the top instead of the make-it-or-break-it main event.
• Insert the penis and a finger at the same time – To boost the feeling of ‘fullness,’ the person doing the penetration can insert a finger in addition to their penis. Bonus points if he uses his thumb and applies pressure downward toward the anus. This hits the extra-sensitive nerve endings situated around the region and can lead to mind-blowing sex.
• Skip the lube – While lube may be a plus for bigger penises, it's not for smaller ones. The slipperiness may make it difficult to feel the sensations involved. So, do skip the lube.
• Use a penis extender – Do seek out a penis extender that feels just as good to the wearer as they do to the person being penetrated. These extenders tend to feature interior ribs and nubs that can help stimulate the penis during thrusting.
• Get adventurous with anal play – Always been too scared to take a penis in your ass even though you've always fantasized about it? Well, here's the perfect chance. Given micropenises' sizes, they can be a blessing when it comes to anal sex. For deeper play, consider experimenting with double penetration with toys like dildos (including strap-ons) and butt plugs.

So – does size matter?

Hopefully, as you can see by now, it’s honestly not about the actual inches of the penis, but rather what both parties do with what’s available and how it all feels when you’re together. And it’s worthwhile mentioning that each penis is unique – other than differences in length and girth, there is also considerable variation in the angle of an erect penis. Some penises point straight up, while others straight down. Some have a slight bend to the right or left. There is no right shape. Depending on preferences, some individuals may enjoy a bent penis, while others would prefer it to be straight through-and-through.

So, as it turns out, the old saying is pretty much true: it’s not the size of the boat that matters, but the motion of the ocean. At the end of the day, if you’re not an attentive lover, the size of your penis means next to nothing. Always remember that mutually pleasurable sex has less to do with penis size, and way more to do with everything surrounding actual penetration.