Imagine that you’re in a decently happy relationship, and things are going fine –especially in the bedroom, behind closed doors. Then, one day, you find out that your partner’s been sleeping around with another person. And instead of feeling hurt or jealous, you become intensely aroused as you thought about her being pleasured by another. Could there be something wrong with you, mentally? No – don't worry, you're normal. As it turns out, there are many people out there who get off on the thought of their partners getting it on with a third party. It's such a common fantasy that there's a kink devoted to the idea: cuckolding. In this article, you'll understand what cuckolding is all about, why it’s so appealing, and what you can do if you want to further act on this fetish.
The term 'cuckolding' means something different from what it used to. Traditionally, the word 'cuckold' was used as a humiliating label to describe the husband of an unfaithful wife. The word itself is based on the female cuckoo bird, which changes male partners to lay their eggs in other birds' nests.
These days, cuckolding refers to a kink. It's a compelling sexual fantasy for men who get aroused by the idea of their significant others (such as a girlfriend or wife) having sex with someone else. But cuckolding is more specific than swinging or having a threesome.If you browse through the cuckolding category on Pornhub, you'd find that much of the content available focuses on submissive themes, where the guys are humiliated for having a tiny penis compared to the well-endowed bull (the guy that beds the partner).
Cuckolding can be enjoyed without any sense of humiliation – the most popular term for this on Doublelist is “hot-wifing.”
As with any sexual kink, it’s challenging to pinpoint one reason why cuckolds like to be sexually dunked on, but here are a few possible motivations:
The woman can also find excitement, fulfillment, and stimulation from the sexual exploration of the kink. Pleasing their partners through exploring the taboo can be very pleasurable. Being in the center of attention of multiple sexual partners can feel very powerful, after all. Ultimately, a woman can come away from the cuckolding experience feeling incredibly sexy and confident.
Sure it can. Unfortunately, it often does. Cuckolding can even lead to the demise of relationships if any of the following situations occur:
When it comes to kinks and fantasies, always remember that communication and mutual enjoyment are the bedrocks to any mutually-satisfying relationship. If you stay mindful that you need to treat your partner as a person first and foremost, rather than an object that can provide sexual gratification, you’ll be fine.
There are many ways to tiptoe into fulfilling this fantasy before you take another person home to enter the bone zone with your partner.
To start, you could describe your fantasies about her getting it on with another person while you when having sex with her. To ramp up the intensity of the kink further, you could also get your partner to talk about her past sexual encounters – in detail. If you’re worried that you may get jealous, ask her to make up the first few.
Then, once you’re sure that you want to put these cuckolding desires into action, you could go to a bar with your partner and give her permission to flirt with another guy. See how that makes you feel. Does it turn you on, or does it hurt you? Remember that how far you go with this fantasy is entirely up to you, and you should never do something you’re not 100% comfortable with.
But if both you and your partner are excited about acting out your kink, consider sending her out to have sex with other men, then getting her to tell you all about her experience. Other men may be more receptive to having sex with your partner if you’re not around to watch—though that’s obviously not always the case.
If you find that hearing about her experience is not arousing enough for you and you need to be there to witness her pleasure, then the Internet will be your best friend. You can put up ads on Doublelist to search for a suitable bull. Be sure to involve your partner when you write out a detailed description of what (and who) you’re looking for. That way you’ll both be on the same page, and it will mitigate unpleasant surprises.
The reality of watching your partner have sex with a third party – or knowing they're doing it, if you're not present – is often very different from the fantasy. It’s also a new experience for your partner. It can dredge up unexpected, powerful emotions, so take baby steps and keep talking and communicating with your partner to ensure that you're both enjoying yourselves. After all, isn't that what a kink is all about?
Ready to give it a shot? Start looking for couples near you.